Dear Nigerian women, if your husband sleeps constantly around (sex ONCE by any party which they maybe unaware of is enough to catch any deadly disease but by now you may know as he shows you, you are in fear and paranoid), he beats you (the dead women have been buried and are yet to be ressurected) and you are so damaged psychologically or emotionally or physically and you refuse sex or unable consciously or unconsciously to yield to demands and sexual/marital ‘rights’.
Don’t be stupid in the name of religion, legal contract or marriage or faith and stay back. Even God who knows and loves ’till death do us part’ will be happy that you helped yourself and saved the life which he gave to you too.
No one will blame you as a runaway because Nigerian men, some of their women, the laws do not believe in or recognize marital rape.
RUN for your life!
While you are trying to settle which may not be the case or separate or divorce and you are ‘still’ trying or in the process- whatever, ruuuuunnnn, don’t be an idiot. Don’t be a bloody fool and stay receiving either the blows or marital rape, sorry-I mean sex between two legally married people and then, still cry fowl.
As far as I’m concerned, my parents’ marriage’s the best, wonderful love birds and supporting one another, amazing and admirable and I pray to have a great one as theirs and a much a better one than theirs but that does not mean it is same for others in or outside Nigeria.
I have two family friends who have two wives or three and they are Igbos and Christians amazingly living admirably in peace but that is rarely the case in majority of Igbo homes with multiple wives. I also have many family friends who are Muslims and with many wives and living in peace but they too will logically use their mouth to tell you that this peace is not found everywhere too in like families. So as a human, woman, a believer in God, practicing lawyer, daughter of one whose family understands and worked with legal system and believe God, civil and human rights but yet believe that certain laws and even religious stuff sometimes seem appropriate, just run.
I don’t know where and why you will stay and be forced and brutalized but if you had no chance to make the decision at all and the surprise of the disagreed marital rape fell on you, sorry but yet, run for your life. I had visited some women in the past in hospitals along with our fellow lawyers or bosses who are males and they too have asked them why they did not run or protect their lives knowing fully well that there is so little a lawyer or police or religious representative can do to save you in ‘certain’ issues.
I am not arguing with anyone o. I am not disagreeing my dear people or even agreeing.
I come in peace intelligent ones; we all learn every day. I come and go in peace too.